Word Crimes - Weird Al Yankovic

Word Crimes LRC歌词

[00:00.66]
[Intro]

[00:01.39]Everybody shut up, WOO!

[00:06.93]Everyone listen up!

[00:10.57]Hey, hey, hey

[00:11.41]Hey, hey, hey

[00:13.46]Hey, hey, hey

[00:14.63]
[Verse 1]

[00:17.31]If you can't write in the proper way

[00:21.63]If you don't know how to conjugate

[00:25.24]Maybe you flunked that class

[00:27.55]And maybe now you find

[00:29.52]That people mock you online

[00:32.29]
[Bridge]

[00:33.03]Okay, now here's the deal

[00:35.55]I'll try to educate ya

[00:37.47]Gonna familiarize

[00:39.39]You with the nomenclature

[00:41.40]You'll learn the definitions

[00:43.39]Of nouns and prepositions

[00:45.45]Literacy's your mission

[00:47.36]
[Chorus]

[00:48.10]And that's why I think it's a good time

[00:50.95]To learn some grammar

[00:52.92]Now, did I stammer

[00:54.66]Work on that grammar

[00:56.26]You should know when

[00:59.15]It's "less" or it's "fewer"

[01:00.91]Like people who were

[01:02.79]Never raised in a sewer

[01:04.67]I hate these word crimes

[01:07.03]Like I could care less

[01:08.80]That means you do care

[01:11.87]At least a little

[01:12.84]Don't be a moron

[01:14.73]You'd better slow down

[01:16.58]And use the right pronoun

[01:19.26]Show the world you're no clown

[01:20.27]
[Verse 2]

[01:20.84]Say you got a "It"

[01:22.13]Followed by apostrophe, "s"

[01:24.29]Now what does that mean?

[01:26.55]You would not use "it’s" in this case

[01:28.65]As a possessive

[01:30.38]It's a contraction

[01:32.07]What's a contraction?

[01:34.07]Well, it's the shortening of a word, or a group of words

[01:36.31]By the omission of a sound or letter

[01:36.95]
[Bridge]

[01:37.23]Okay, now here's some notes

[01:38.46]Syntax you’re always mangling

[01:40.34]No X in "Espresso"

[01:42.07]Your participle's danglin'

[01:44.16]But I don't want your drama

[01:46.26]If you really wanna

[01:48.27]Leave out that Oxford comma

[01:49.62]
[Chorus]

[01:50.21]"be", "see", "are", "you"

[01:52.81]Are words, not letters

[01:56.29]Get it together

[01:58.18]Use your spellchecker

[01:59.81]You should never

[02:01.91]Write words using numbers

[02:03.50]Unless you're seven

[02:05.46]Or your name is Prince

[02:07.47]I hate these word crimes

[02:09.74]You really need a

[02:11.58]Full-time proofreader

[02:13.36]You dumb mouthbreather

[02:15.25]Well, you should hire

[02:17.57]Some cunning linguist

[02:19.10]To help you distinguish

[02:21.01]What is proper English

[02:22.52]
[Verse 3]

[02:23.17]One thing I ask of you

[02:24.98]Time to learn your homophones is past due

[02:27.17]Learn to diagram a sentence too

[02:29.05]Always say to whom

[02:30.21]Don't ever say to who

[02:31.17]And listen up when I tell you this

[02:33.03]I hope you never use quotation marks for emphasis

[02:35.15]You finished second grade

[02:36.37]I hope you can tell

[02:37.24]If you're doing good or doing well

[02:38.93]Figure out the difference

[02:41.11]Irony is not coincidence

[02:42.89]And, I thought that you'd gotten it through your skull

[02:44.85]What's figurative and what's literal

[02:46.82]Oh but, just now, you said

[02:48.86]You "literally couldn't get out of bed"

[02:51.03]That really makes me want to literally

[02:52.72]Smack a crowbar upside your stupid head

[02:54.45]
[Chorus]

[02:54.85]I read your e-mail

[02:56.99]It's quite apparent

[02:58.83]Your grammar's errant

[03:00.58]You're incoherent

[03:02.50]Saw your blog post

[03:04.45]It's really fantastic

[03:06.66]That was sarcastic (Oh, psych!)

[03:08.66]’Cause you write like a spastic

[03:10.19]I hate these Word Crimes

[03:12.89]Your prose is *****

[03:14.78]Think you should only

[03:16.46]Write in emoji

[03:18.37]Oh, you're a lost cause

[03:20.89]Go back to preschool

[03:22.56]Get out of the gene pool

[03:24.32]Try your best to not drool

[03:25.98]
[Outro]

[03:26.58]Never mind, I give up

[03:28.86]Really now, I give up

[03:33.29]Hey, hey, hey

[03:35.45]Hey, hey, hey

[03:37.45]Go Away!